I'm Still Here
by thatcrawleygirl
Summary: Finding out about the affair left her broken. Now a year later Diane Lockhart finally has her life together again. But when an accident causes them to meet again, what happens when they discover they might just still need each other? (set after TGF s1e10 - Chaos)
1. Chapter 1

The phone call came unexpectedly, as they tend to do in these circumstances. He had been in an accident, that was all they said. Didn't they understand that that was never enough? How many times has Diane laughed at the movies whenever something momentous would happen and suddenly everything would be in slow motion or worse: black and white. It always seemed to her so silly and unnecessary and yet, here she was, putting her phone down, her surroundings fading into the background and losing their colour. Or what was it importance they were losing?

She did not hear Marissa asking if she was okay. She did not hear Adrian come to her with cases, or Maia seeking advice. All she could do was quickly pack her handbag, grab her coat and leave. It wasn't until she was outside and the frosty air slapped her in the face that Diane remembered she also had to breath. One breath at a time she made it to the car and through an unusually long drive to Harbour Hospital.

Silently Diane cursed her brain. It was her asset, the one thing she could count on, no matter the situation, but here she was unable to think clearly, taking longer than she should have to locate the clearly signposted reception desk. Her vision was misted by an oncoming stream of tears she has been trying hard blink back for almost half an hour. Diane must have looking around like a madwoman because soon a nurse appeared by her side, trying to find out who she was looking for. "Look, ma'am, you gotta tell me a name"

"McVeigh. Kurt McVeigh" Diane managed to get out in between looks into nearby rooms.

"Okay. I've got a Kurt McVeigh in Room 108 but you have to be family to see him."

"I'm his..." What does she call him? Husband-who-cheated-and-now-I'm-separated-from-but-potentially-want-to-reconcile-with? "I'm his next of kin" Diane settled on the term used by the nurse who phoned to inform her of the accident. Perhaps it was the most accurate of all.

"You don't sound so certain," the nurse eyed Diane carefully "but it'll do for now. Down that corridor, second left and its the second room on the right."

"Thank you," Diane uttered in return, already making her way down the corridor, which was, as she suspected, nowhere near long enough for her to prepare for what could greet her once she enters the room on the right. Just as she was about to enter, her legs failed her. It became apparent that she won't be able to move until being at least a little more steady, so Diane leaned against the wall and focused on her breathing.

Through a half open door, she could see into the room opposite where a young woman was staring blankly at a gurney on which two legs could be seen underneath the blue fabric. Diane felt a new hot flush of tears threaten to wash over her as images of Will flashed before her eyes. It's been 3 years and still whenever she thought about him she couldn't help but get misty eyed... Oh god she couldn't go through all that again, especially not with Kurt.

"As long as you're out there you might as well come in." Kurt's voice was clear and steady and Diane cursed herself for letting him see her falling apart. She took one last deep breath and walked into his room, treading the ground carefully, almost, if she was honest, reluctantly.

"How long were you watching?" Please let the conversation go anywhere other than the accident, that was the plan. Thank god they were always so good at avoiding the uncomfortable conversations.

"A few minutes." Diane waited for him to say more but of course silence followed. Her cowboy was as stoic as ever. The tension in the room was only interrupted by the steady beeping of the machines attached to Kurt's body. Somehow Diane only noticed them now and the shock and worry must have been so evident on her face that Kurt was prompted to elaborate. "I promise it's not as bad as it looks."

"I certainly hope so because it looks very bad."

Suddenly, Diane lost it. All those tears she's held back since receiving the fateful phone call overwhelmed her and she knelt beside Kurt's bed. "Oh Kurt what were you thinking? You are not 20 years old anymore, you can't just run around and hope for the best! Did you even think about what would happen if you died...what would happen to me?" She did not intend to say those last words but Diane knew not to trust her tongue when overcome with emotion. She took his hand and buried her face in it, soaking up the warm, familiar feeling she realised she sorely missed. She felt safe, protected. Though she would never admit it out loud for fear of one of her friends overhearing and using it against her, Diane liked the feeling of being protected. It was a feeling she didn't realise she needed so much until meeting him.

Kurt wanted nothing more than to comfort her, to dry of her tears and tell her everything will be alright, but the ambiguity of their relationship made him pause, pause long enough for a nurse to come in and interrupt them. "I'm worry but next of kin or not there are still visiting hours," she said. In a second, Diane went from being his Diane to Ms Lockhart, top Chicago lawyer. Kurt observed the change curiously, admiring her professionalism. She stood up straighter, her gaze unwavering, and straightened out her dress. Grabbing her handbag Diane looked at him and after a moment's hesitation kissed him gently on the forehead. "I'll be back as soon as I can tomorrow."

"Looking forward to it." Kurt replied, but Diane was already out of earshot.


	2. Chapter 2

It was quiet on Newport Street that evening. There were never masses of people, but usually Diane would come across a few people walking, rushing from work or cutting through to get to someplace else. This was of course only when she wasn't coming home in the early hours of the morning, which lately hasn't been very often at all. Tonight, Diane would have preferred some noise, someone to pass by so she could observe them and get her mind of Kurt lying in that hospital bed, all alone and attached to what seemed like dozens of machines. For the first time, she saw him look fragile and helpless, so different from the cowboy she always pictured . However all she could hear was the sound of her own heels hitting the pavement, perfectly in time with her heartbeat, which hasn't slowed down since the trip to the hospital. As began to fall around her, Diane quickened her pace. It wasn't long before she upon her house, standing at the very end of the street. It wasn't particularly big, just large enough to blend in with the general appearance of the neighbourhood, and while it was lacking the elaborate flowerbeds that seemed to be a staple part of the surrounding houses, no one could deny that it was generally well kept. Diane remembered buying that house. It was the year Stern, Lockhart & Gardner had been set up, and she resigned herself to the fact that her dog would be the only living creature she would be sharing that house with. Yet, here she was, 13 years and a failed marriage later and still that house was her's alone.

Walking up the porch and fumbling in her handbag for the keys, Diane arrived at her door. She unlocked it as fast as she could and immediately found herself in a dark, cold room, becoming increasingly aware of the nagging thought at the back of her mind, reminding her that, again, she was coming home to an empty house. Diane had come home late at night enough times to be able to navigate her house without turning on the lights, even when her head was pounding and she felt like she was about to pass out from exhaustion. She kicked of her shoes, dropped her coat on the couch and quickly made her way into the bedroom. Before she could reach the door, Diane came upon a framed photograph hanging on the wall. Within the silver coloured frame, she could make out the two figures: a man in a plaid shirt and a woman in a turtleneck laughing and smiling at the camera. They were spending one of Diane's rare weekends off at one of Kurt's friend's cabin, spending time doing nothing but drinking wine and arguing politics. Kurt had been insistent for that photograph to be hung up, citing that her appearance outside the office was so rare, it required visual proof. Diane only wished she could remember what she was laughing at.

_"What time are we driving out tomorrow?" It was past midnight and for the first time in what seemed like months Diane wasn't sitting buried in paperwork, but rather buried in a warm blanket with a mug of chamomile tea in her hand, watching her husband pull back the covers and climb into bed beside her._

_"Dunno. 10?" _

_"Yeah, that sounds good." She placed the mug on the bedside table and stretched her hand out to turn off the light switch. As the room went dark, with only a ray of moonlight escaping past the heavy curtains, Diane became aware of how quiet the cabin was. "I had a nice time you know." Diane whispered after a while, turning to face Kurt and placing her hand on his chest, comforted but his steady breathing. _

_"I'm glad."_

_"We should do this more often."_

_"We should."_

_Diane raised her head and tried to look Kurt in the eyes. "Would you like me to stop talking?" _

_Kurt gave a little chuckle and wrapped his arms around her. "I like it when you talk." Diane rested her head on his shoulder, inhaling the slight gunpowder smell left over from a day of hunting. They were isolated from the surrounding world, the one filled with deadlines and business trips and constant reasons to be apart. _

An incoming text message shook Diane out of her nostalgia. She contemplated ignoring it, communication seemed to only bring bad news recently, but something made her glance at the phone screen. "Hi." A simple message glared back at Diane, as if daring her to open it, but Diane waited until she had walked into the bedroom and sat on the king size bed that was really much too large for just one person, especially on nights like this. She glanced at the clock on her bedside table and it surprised her to find it wasn't even that late yet. God only knows when the last time she was home this early was.

"Hi." Diane hesitated before pressing send, her finger hovering over the button for a few seconds, and she found her heart racing as she waited for an answer. It took less than a minute for Kurt to reply.

"How are you?"

"Good. You?"

"Good."

Once again it was up to Diane to keep up the conversation. She typed 'what are you doing?' but quickly deleted it. What a stupid question to ask someone in a hospital. Instead she settled on "How are you feeling?" It wasn't much better but at least didn't make her sound completely incompetent.

"You worry too much, you know." Diane almost laughed. Now is the time he decides to be talkative and this is the first topic he picks.

"Then you really shouldn't give me that much to worry about."

'How are you Diane? Really?" Of course he knew she was hiding herself and there may have been a point when Diane felt she could reveal anything to him without fear of judgement or dismissal, but how could she let him come close after he betrayed her? How could she open herself up again only for a chance to get hurt again?

"Tired." She suddenly understood Kurt's reluctancy to talk about his feelings; it's so much easier to skid over and ignore them. It wasn't that she didn't tell the truth, she was exhausted and if it wasn't for the turbulent sea of thoughts that wasn't calming down any time soon, she would gladly have been fast asleep.

"Sorry, don't mean to keep you up. Goodnight then." It was logical of course to end the conversation there. They both need sleep and if they were to think straight tomorrow, they would need their rest, and yet Diane wasn't ready. She was surprised to find herself smiling each time she thought of him, eager to keep going. If they were to fix anything between them, they would have to keep a conversation going and this was certainly a start.

They didn't talk for long, it was after all getting late, but at least they talked. Diane's new firm, Kurt's new cases, mutual friends (which was to say Diane's friends who happen to be acquainted with Kurt)... When they finally did say goodnight, Diane put down her phone climbed under the covers, not bothering to get changed or wash off her makeup, just interested in closing her eyes and waiting for tomorrow.


	3. Chapter 3

Diane woke up startled by the sudden ringing of her alarm clock. "Oh for God's sake." she muttered under her breath, frantically scrambling to switch on her phone and turn the damn thing off. She closed her eyes one last time before reluctantly dragging herself out of bed.

Most morning weren't like this. Diane made it a point early on in her career to always wake up early, even on the weekends, in fact she could probably count on one hand the number of times she had been in bed after 8 am. Today, however, was different, her mind wasn't preoccupied with work like it normally was.

It wasn't until she went into the bathroom and saw her reflection in the mirror over the sink that she remembered that she didn't even get changed out of the clothes she wore yesterday. As she washed off the slightly smudged makeup, Diane carefully examined her face. The wrinkles and lines that she was normally able to mask with affirmations of a successful career and an immaculate fashion sense became glaringly obvious to her. Seeing Kurt in a state of helplessness inadvertently reminded her of her own mortality. It got her thinking about what it was she wanted to get out of life? There is, after all, nothing worse than regret.

Taking off her dress and replacing it with a silk dressing gown, Diane made her way towards her closet and took out a simple navy dress she only wore on days when leaving the house in the morning was the last thing she wanted to do. The next step was to select her jewellery. Amidst her usual selection of necklaces, there was a discreet rose gold ring pendant that caught her eye, and she took it out to examine. At first glance there was nothing particularly special about. It was elegant, sure, but it wasn't until one looked closely that an engraving can be noticed. 'Diane, always' was written in cursive along the inside of the ring.

Diane smiled as she read over the words, remembering how surprised she was when Kurt presented her with it, not in the least because he managed to pick out something she would actually happily wear. It was their first hunting trip back in the first year of their marriage and he said it was a thank you gift for putting up with all his friends. She didn't dare reveal how much she enjoyed herself for fear he would just insist on spending all of their holidays together in the middle of nowhere.

Diane didn't even have time to make herself a cup of coffee before her phone started ringing. "Hello?" Diane balanced the phone on her shoulder as she tried to get her shoes out from the back of the closet, but after failing miserably to do so without toppling over, she slumped onto the nearest armchair and proceeded with the conversation.

"We're on our way to the courthouse." The voice on the other side of the line sounded rushed and anxious.

"Good morning to you too Adrian."

"What? Oh, yes, good morning... sorry, thought you'd be awake by now."

"No, no, I am. It's just... oh never mind. Why are you on the way to the courthouse?"

"Second Helix. The trial's just been pushed to today."

"But it wasn't on the schedule till the 28th?"

"Yeah well not anymore. How quickly can you get here?"

"Umm... give me 20 minutes?"

"Alright. I'll meet you by the entrance." Diane was halfway through saying goodbye when she realised Adrian had already hung up. She sighed and quickly slipped on the shoes she was wearing yesterday, and, grabbing her car keys and the handbag that still lay unpacked from yesterday, made her way to the car.

"Who knew pharmaceutical companies liked expediency?" True to his word, Adrian was waiting for her in front of the courthouse as she pulled up, holding two cups of coffee and placing one in Diane's hand as soon as she stepped out. "Though you might need it," he told her as she returned a grateful smile. Diane took a one big sip and swallowed hard.

"What's in this?"

"Almond milk. You don't like it?"

"No, it's... wonderful." She made herself take a few more sips, caffeine was caffeine after all.

"Who's the judge?"

"You won't like it. Jameson."

"Oh dear God," Diane rolled her eyes, "Isn't he a ray of sunshine?"

Adrian pushed open the heavy wooden doors of the courtroom to reveal a scene consisting of the witness at the stand weeping hysterically with the ASA shoving papers in her face, and Maia frantically trying to get an objection in edgeways but miserably failing as the sobbing drowned out any of her uncertain words. The judge was staring at it all with an amused expression until he noticed the pair that had just walked in.

"Ah! Nice of you two to show up."

"We apologise, your Honour. We only just —"

"Yeah, yeah, excuses. I'm not running a 24/7 diner here, so if I say the trial is at 9, then I expect everyone to be here at 9! Now do I make myself perfectly clear?"

"Perfectly, your Honour." Diane had to take a deep breath and bite her lip to keep herself from losing her temper. Andrew Jameson infuriated her 15 years ago and he certainly infuriated her now.

They spent three hours engaging in what can only be described as a shouting match when at last Jameson decided he had enough entertainment for the day and it was time for his lunch break.

"I'm gonna need an aspirin every time I walk out of that room." Maia complained.

Diane let out a gently chuckle and put her hand on her goddaughter's shoulder. "It gets better."

The three of them drove back to the office in silence, each engrossed in their own thoughts, but Diane barely managed to step out of elevator when Marissa intercepted her. "Ms Lockhart, there's a phone call for you. It's your husband." She had been so preoccupied with the case that she barely gave Kurt another thought all morning, but the mention of a phone call brought back all of yesterday's feelings. She didn't even notice the bewildered look on Adrian's face at the mention of a husband.

"Thank you." Diane mumbled before heading in the direction of her office and leaving her companions to question Marissa.

"Hello?" Diane sat down behind her dress and picked up the phone.

"Diane?" Kurt's voice sounded stronger than it was yesterday. "I'm not interrupting anything, am I?"

"No, not at all. Shouldn't you be resting though?"

"I getting discharged in about two hours and—"

"And you didn't think you should have lead with that? Do I have to drag everything out of you?" The silence that followed told Diane to keep talking. She really should be used to it by now. "So what are your plans?"

"Drive home I guess. There shouldn't be much traffic this time of day but but who knows?"

"You can't drive to the country all by yourself, you just spent the night in a hospital for God's sake! I'll pick you up." Diane glanced at her wristwatch, mentally calculating how long it would take her to get her to finish up her work, gather her things and drive to the hospital and then all the way to Kurt's house. That'll put her home at around 8, which would still be earlier than any time she would be coming if she came from the office.

"No don't. I'll be fine."

"I'm not letting you drive by yourself. Look, I have a partners' meeting at 2 so I'll pick you up round half past three."

"I am not a child Diane."

"No you are a grown man who should know that sometimes you need help. I will meet you in the cafe round the corner, the one with the yellow banner?and that's the end of that. Good bye Kurt." Diane hung up the phone before Kurt had another chance to protest. She closed her eyes and leaned back as thoughts of her marriage filled her mind.

3 o'clock came round faster than expected. In that time, Diane only managed to absentmindedly complete paperwork from this mornings trial fiasco and spend the partners' meeting trying to focus on what the others were saying rather than drift off into her own world. At last she put on her coat and walked out of the office, carefully avoiding anyone who might intercept and give her something else to do.

As promised, Diane pulled up to the cafe with the yellow banner just after half past three and walked in, expecting to find Kurt already there and ready to make some lighthearted comment about how she's always the last one there, but he was nowhere to be seen so, after looking around in vain, Diane found the nearest free table and sat down to wait.

The cafe was empty except for an elderly couple laughing over coffee and a young woman sitting in the corner typing away on her laptop. Diane looked around carefully before getting the waiter's attention and, after remembering this morning's unfortunate coffee, ordering green tea. It was brought and the cup almost drunk before she heard a familiar voice come from behind.

"Didn't mean to keep you waiting." Diane turned around. "No problem. I was just getting better acquainted with the local scenery. Care to join?"

Kurt pulled up a chair and sat down opposite her. "So... how was your day?"

"Fine. And yours?"

"Fine."

There was that usual silence that seemed to follow them around these days. "Well, isn't this a fun conversation." Diane laughed a little as she took another sip of her tea, careful not to break eye contact with Kurt, who was observing her carefully. "Is, umm, everything alright?"

"Yeah."

"We should get going, otherwise I'm gonna be driving back in the middle of the night." She promptly asked for the bill and, having payed it, swiftly took her bag off the chair and led Kurt outside.

While they were inside it had started to rain and the sudden exposure to the cold air made Diane shudder and wrap her coat around her body more tightly, so she was more than happy to get inside the car and shut the door behind her. "Gotta love Chicago. Beginning of March and it's still cold as hell and snow is still lying on the ground," Diane complained, half forgetting there was someone in the car with her. Kurt only smiled in response and fastened his seatbelt.

They have been driving for a couple hours now. The city landscape of Chicago was slowly disappearing and being replaced by nature scenery filled with dark forest. Diane remembered driving up this road for the first time seven years ago. She always liked living in the city with all of its modern conveniences, so she never had the need to travel outside it, but over time she learned to appreciate the green surroundings and even began to enjoy them. Being careful to keep her voice steady, she interrupted the quiet atmosphere. "So... you're a hero now?" She felt Kurt's gaze upon her. "I saw the video. The one–" she had to pause once her voice began to quiver.

"It was nothing."

"I represent unscrupulous people and you... you save children."

Kurt lifted his hand and wiped the tear from her cheek which she hadn't realised had fell. Hesitantly, Diane took one hand off the wheel and wrapped it tightly around Kurt's. Then she took a deep breath and continued staring at the road ahead.


	4. Chapter 4

"Stay. I'll light a fire." It was a simple sentence and yet it caused Diane's heart to beat even faster. They had arrived at Kurt's place just as it was getting dark and of course staying was out of the question. However much they would try to go around the word, the truth was that they were separated and have just gotten good at it, and staying would mean going back to the start. Yet here she was, finding herself actually contemplating the idea. That was when she made the fatal mistake of looking into his eyes, the eyes that expressed such sorrow and longing that all Diane wanted to do in that moment was say yes, a million times yes and bring him close. He was hurting, it was obvious. At last Diane couldn't stand it any longer and found herself walking back to the car, carefully turning off the ignition and then returning back to Kurt. How come it was always her heart that steered her whenever she was in his presence?

The moment their hands met a warmth washed over her that made her flinch. It was familiar and, as much as she would like to deny it, it felt right. As the pair made their way towards the house, Diane couldn't help remembering the last time her feet touched this gravel path. It was over a year ago when she drove out here with the sole intent of collecting her things. She didn't even go past the front door then, not trusting herself to quite keep her emotions in check. Now... Diane watched her husband take out the keys and wince slightly as he lifted his hand to place the key into the lock.

The moment she walked through the heavy door, she felt the rustic mahogany smell envelope her. "I'm gonna get started on that fire. There's beer in the kitchen if you want." Kurt said before glancing around awkwardly and disappearing into the living room. He was always good at concealing his feeling but Diane could tell he was almost as nervous as her. Quickly nodding, she made her way towards the kitchen, her legs leading her without any intervention from the brain necessary. Once alone, Diane let out a breath she hadn't realised she'd been holding since they entered the house. Looking around observingly, she noticed how little has changed. Diane could have sworn even the coffee mug was in the exact same place in the sink as after their last breakfast here together. Next she moved on to the fridge, opening which she couldn't help but let out a small chuckle. No wonder Kurt looked thinner if his fridge contained nothing but beer and what Diane could only assume were leftovers of Chinese takeaway. She hoped intensly there was something else to be found in the cupboards but didn't dare open them, instead taking out two beers, opening them and carrying them into the living room. She found the fire already lit and Kurt sitting on the couch.

"You have eaten since I last saw you, right?" Diane joined him on the couch, carefully choosing a spot far enough as not to suggest a desire to rekindle their romance, yet close enough to still be able to smell the familiar scent of gunpowder. They sat in comfortable silence until Diane spoke up. "You've made quite an impression on my assistant."

"Have I?"

"Yeah. She found a video of you on YouTube, now shows it to all who would watch."

"I told you, it was nothing."

"It wasn't nothing, Kurt." She turned slightly to her left to look him directly in the eyes, "Even the doctors said you were lucky. You could have gotten hurt much more..." Diane felt her voice rise slightly and she turned her face away. She felt his rough hands brush through her hair and gently cup her face, his thumbs carefully brushing away the steady flow of tears.

"Hey." Kurt noticed Diane's mouth begin to open but before she could say anything he pulled her into a gentle kiss. They sat closed eyed for a couple seconds, then he felt Diane's lips pull away.

"I can't do this Kurt. I'm sorry, I just –" Diane stood up and, making up some flimsy excuse, left the room, using all her willpower to keep herself from running. The first room she came upon was the bathroom and she rushed in, turning the lock behind her.

As soon as she was safely inside, Diane leaned back against the white wooden door and slid down, ending up seated on the cold floor with her arms clutching her knees. Kurt's kiss still felt warm on her lips and Diane reprimanded herself for stopping it. God knows she wanted it to go on forever. She wanted him to take her into his arms and hold her tight and keep kissing her until the sun came up again... but that was all in the past, a past in which there was no Holly. He was sorry, of course he was, and he's said it enough times for her to believe it, but that did not stop her from picturing that other woman touching him just now as he kissed her. Diane opened her eyes as if to escape the nightmare in her head and swallowed hard. Coming to her senses, she looked around the small room. Just like the kitchen, the bathroom was frozen in time with everything from the towels to the toothbrush seemingly left untouched. She forced herself to stand up and made her way towards the cabinet about the sink, her curiosity about his life without her peaked. Everything was as expected there, the majority of the space occupied by the various hotel shampoo and shower gels bottles collected over his multitude of trips, except as Diane moved the shaving equipment out of the way she couldn't help but smile. There was her toothbrush and hand cream hidden away in the corner, items she never bothered to collect, assuming Kurt would throw everything away the minute he got the chance. Obviously it meant much more to him than she previously thought. Maybe she underestimated how much he has suffered this past year.

There was a knock on the door that caused Diane to break out of her train of thought.

"Hey, are you alright in there?" His voice was soft and gentle, careful not to scare her off again.

"Umm...yeah. Just give me a minute." She examined the damage done by the tears and rinsed her face with cold water, partly to reduce the redness and partly to clean up the mascara that by now had begun to run. With a newly found confidence, Diane opened the door and came face to face with Kurt. They stood still gazing at each other for a few second, unable to move, until the sudden chiming of the grandfather clock, which stood ominously by the front doors.

"We should probably..."

"Yeah." They awkwardly manoeuvred out of the narrow hallway, both trying to give the other person space while at the same time secretly wanting to get as close as possible. Diane was just about to walk away when she suddenly turned around, but it took her a moment to form her words.

"I should get the couch ready," she said at last, "it's getting late."

"I'm not letting you sleep on the couch, Diane"

"Well you just got out of the hospital so you can't very well sleep there."

"We're two grown, married people. I think we can be trusted to stay in the same bed without any..." He paused for a moment to search for the right words. "Untoward business."

This made Diane chuckle but she promptly nodded. "Alright." They made their way up the stairs in silence, albeit this time not an uncomfortable one. Diane couldn't help noticing Kurt's constant glances in her direction. She got the feeling he needed reassurance that she was still following him and that the event unfolding were not, in fact, simply a figment of his imagination. As he opened the door to the bedroom, they found themselves again face to face and Diane gave him a reassuring smile before walking in.

It was not a large room. Granted it wasn't minuscule either, but Diane remembered thinking if it wasn't for Kurt's simplistic style, this room would have been more suited for storage rather than a bedroom. There was a double bed in the centre, accentuated by a bed side table on each side, each topped with a book. Diane couldn't make out the title but felt it safe to assume the one on the right held some Russian novel or whatever it was she happened to have been reading at the time.

Kurt gestured to the closet standing against the wall opposite the bed. "You can find something to wear for the night," he said before giving Diane one last glance and making his way into the en-suite bathroom, again leaving her alone. With nothing else to do, Diane opened the closet doors and took out one of Kurt's t-shirts that she remembered wearing whenever she would end up spending the night. She unclasped the mulberry-coloured dress and after hanging it on the back of a chair, put the t-shirt on. Diane was just about to take advantage of Kurt's absence and make a little inspection of the bedroom when she heard a loud groan come from the direction of the bathroom. Instantly, she was at the door. "Kurt? Everything alright?"

Through some more muffled groans she heard a response. "Yeah... everything's fine... don't worry."

"You're obviously in pain! Just let me in "

"Diane, I'm fine. I can take care of myself."

"I'm sure you can but the whole purpose of me being here is so I can help. Now will you please just open the goddamn door?"

There were a few moments of silence before Kurt quietly replied "It's open."

Diane took a second to brace herself for the worst before pressing against the door handle. Kurt was seated on the edge of the bathtub with an utterly defeated look in his eyes that made Diane want to both laugh and hug him. Instead, she waited for an explanation.

"I can't get my shirt off without moving my arm and I can't move my arm because of the bandage," he finally admitted in a tone that was more suited for someone giving away government secrets. That tone was the only thing keeping Diane from bursting into laughter. "I thought you were here to help?"

"I am, I am! It's just from the sounds you were making, I assumed I would see blood and gore... not fashion problems."

"Ok, are you done making fun of me?"

"I'm sorry!" Diane came closer. "You're cute when you're grumpy." She began to gently remove his shirt, careful not to apply too much pressure on the skin, and inadvertently let out a small gasp as the injuries became visible. Kurt felt her tense up.

"The doctor said I'll be good as new in a couple weeks."

"That's good." She took a step back and started folding the shirt, an action that made Kurt chuckle and Diane look at him scoldingly. "Now, if there's nothing more I can do, you need to get some sleep," she said sternly and Kurt nodded in response. He stood up and they both left the bathroom, making their way to their sides of the bed. Diane remarked in her head that it was as if nothing's changed. How many times have they, after an evening together in this house, gone upstairs and lay down in their places? There must have been a moment when this place began to be her home too, and that feeling was never quite shaken. Yet this time, just as she was about lie down, she hesitated with thoughts of what might have happened on this bed in her absence flooding in. Kurt must have understood what she was thinking as he said, "It was never here.", which, while it did little to comfort, was reassuring enough that Diane nodded and proceed with getting into bed. As she was pulling the duvet over her legs when Kurt turned towards her. "Thank you," he said, half whispering.

Diane smiled slightly and replied, "Of course," before stretching out her hand and turning off the lights.

They lay perfectly still on their half of the bed until Kurt reached out his hand under the covers until it just about touched Diane's, who in turn laced her fingers through his. Neither of them dared to move any more.


End file.
